Week 5 Blues – Gloom, gloom, and more gloom

From the beginning of the treatment process, the medical team warned us that Week 5 of the combined chemoradiation treatments would be difficult. The fact that so many of them gave us the same warning should have alerted us to what might emerge, but somehow the warnings didn’t really register, especially as when treatment started, my early side effects were mild. Things started to go wobbly on the weekend after Week 4. Nausea intensified from uncomfortable to noticeable and a little intrusive and my eating pace slowed even more. As radiation continued in Week 5 (21-25 Oct) an increasingly unwell and distressed Den was letting all and sundry know that nausea was my biggest concern. The intensity had moved from noticeable to dreadful and by Thursday to unbearable. Fortunately, the diarrhoea/constipation, oesophagiitis, and fatigue remained the same. Each intensification of the nausea led to reduction in my resolve and capacity to keep eating. By Tuesday (22 Oct) I had lost 2 kilos and with alarm bells ringing the dietitian was summonsed to valiantly try to rally my spirits to fortify and treat food as medicine and eat eat eat. Tegan did her best, but looking at a meal, however lovingly prepared and presented, when you feel that if you eat one mouthful the walls of the room would receive a techicolor spray, does not open digestive pathways. LOL. I will be giving feedback at my next treatment reviews that the best thing about combined chemoradiation treatment is that the radiation fatigue allows patients to escape from incapacitating nausea by sleeping. I remember my inspirational sister in law, Frances Foster, who died from mouth cancer, asking me, “Den, can you get them to give me something to knock me out until all the treatments are over?” I understand you very well now, dear Fran. Should I be making and freezing party pies and quiches and buying bottles of single malt whiskey Fran? (Fran catered for her own wake before she went into terminal care. What a woman!)